If you don’t know how to text a girl back in a way that keeps building attraction and sexual tension… she’ll
quickly grow bored.
Whenever you get ready to send a text, take a moment to run through these rules, courtesy of Stylelife Academy:
Rule 1: Don’t text to avoid phone conversation.
Before you send out a text message to a woman you should ask yourself what you hope to gain by this action. The
question pertaining to texting that I receive most from guys generally goes like this:
“The other day I met this girl, and we had a good time. I ran tight game and I number closed her. When should I
text her and what should I text?”
My response to this is, “Don’t text her. Call her.”
It seems to me that many guys, especially those that are just entering the social arts, see texting as a safer
arena for contacting woman than calling them. This is wholly understandable, but entirely unacceptable. Think
realistically about this situation. If you just met a woman and you number closed her, then your next goal is to
have a second meeting with this woman. Keep in mind that the likelihood that you will set this up with her via text
message is lower than if you call her and build more comfort verbally.
Also, if you are texting because of your fear of interacting with this woman, then how will you ever hope to
interact with her comfortably face to face? I would only consider texting a woman in order to set up a day two in
three possible scenarios.
She texts me first, so I must text back.
I call her and she does not answer the phone. Instead of leaving a voice-mail I will send a text, which seems much
less needy to me and are generally received sooner than voice mails.
I text her with the implied purpose of getting her on the phone. In this scenario we may banter back in forth with
text but after a few exchanges I will simply call her.
Rule 2: Bring value when you text. Do not seek value.
Whenever I send an initial text I do not ask an open ended question that is intended to seek value. Some examples
of these might be “What’s up?” or “What are you doing tonight?” In my opinion these texts come off as needy and
invoke no emotion in the woman you are contacting. When I text, my goal is to elicit emotion and display my playful
personality. Example texts of these are “I just saw a guy wearing a fanny pack and it reminded me of you.” or “Hey
dork! I bet you are operating at a level of 100% dorkiness today.” Really lame jokes work well as initial text to
get a good laugh and display playfulness. A recent thread in the Elite forum field tested this concept and had some
nice examples of these. My contribution was:
Text 1: What do you call a fish with no eyes? (Wait for her response)
Text 2: Fssshhh
In addition, if you are texting a woman try and use a humorous “call-back” from the previous time you spoke with
her. A “call-back” is a comedic technique in which you restate a joke you have said previously after a length of
time. For example, if you had previously given a woman you are texting a nickname, like “Tiny Fingers” or “Grabby
Hands”, then use this in your text.
Rule 3: Avoid Sending Too Many Messages!
I know she might be the only thing on your mind at the moment but let’s keep that a secret between us, otherwise
you may freak her out. So, text once and when you get a reply you may text back. If she doesn’t respond to your
text, you should generally hold off until tomorrow before you try to contact her again.
I also wait a few minutes after receiving a text before responding. I do this so that I don’t give off the
impression that the only thing I have going on in my life is waiting for a new female friend to text me. Remember
being non-needy always equals sexy because it conveys that you must have other dating options in life.
Rule 4: Use texting to invoke the law of familiarity.
This is more of a tip, but it’s a damn helpful one. The best method I have found for using text messaging is using
while in set. After I meet a woman and number close her I immediately send her text while in set still standing
next to her. This situation by itself is humorous and if you send a funny message it’s doubly so. Try in-set text
messages like, “You have my number now but you are only allowed to call me once per day” or “Who is that really hot
guy standing next to you?”
If, after texting her, she saves you number, then you can take that as a definite indicator of interest. More
importantly, when you call her later, your phone number will pop up and be familiar.
A woman is always more likely to answer a number she recognizes then one she does not.
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